Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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