just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
