just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Randomize
