Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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