You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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