try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
