Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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