Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Randomize