Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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