as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
