i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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