Moan for me like Helen Keller
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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