how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
