There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
Do vagina's smell?
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
