i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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