What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
