Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
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