No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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