He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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