new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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