Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
