At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
