Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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