Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Randomize
