U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
