You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
