yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
