:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
