I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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