I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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