what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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