Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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