shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
