remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Randomize
