Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
