I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Randomize
