She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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