Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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