I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
