I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Terrible idea I love it
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
