It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
