everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize