why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Who died my cat blue again?
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
