didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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