i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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