Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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