you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
