these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Randomize
