Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
