Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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